Bullying Prevention and Treatment: Ten Ideas
Two years ago I was invited to present about my bullying research to a group in Aspen, Co. The conference was entitled Ten by Ten Ways to Help Our Children. As the representative of the bullying research community, I was asked before I left for Aspen to write ten firm recommendations for helping our children avoid bullying. These ten "recommendations for children's health" were to be placed in the conference handout.
This produced mixed feelings on my part. First, I always remind listeners and readers that bullying prevention involves system and culture change. Because of this, it is exceedingly complex and involves altering the very fabric and climate of our schools in ways that do not always mesh cleanly with our culture. I think that we can all agree that certain aspects of American culture glorify physical prowess, revenge motifs, and violence generally.
However, I accepted the challenge with the results that you see below. Once I started writing down ideas that I thought were reasonably firmly grounded, I found that I enjoyed the process. I hope that you will too.
- Acknowledge and express respect for children's fears about school bullying: Do not close communication by denying their experiences of oppression at the hands of their peers.
- Remain alert for changes in behavior (e.g., avoiding school), appearance, (scuffed or torn clothing) that might reflect a pattern of bullying.
- Set firm and clear expectations for how children are to treat others (in your setting). Review these with youngsters frequently. Bullying of siblings is a significant, related issue.
- Recognize pro-social responses (provide positive feedback) and consistently, firmly, yet gently apply consequences for aggressive behavior. Be sure to name the behavior.
- Please avoid the all-too-common adage that bullying is "normal"; that "boys-will-be boy" and "girls will be girls." All aggression is learned and can be unlearned. Adult acceptance of aggression is a significant predictor of bullying.
- Advocate for the safety of ALL children in your local school and community.
- Support well designed anti bullying, anti violence programs in your schools and community.
- Insist that anti bullying and anti violence programs selected for your school be based on solid, scientific, empirical evidence.
- Model (e.g., demonstrate) gentle, yet assertive interpersonal problem-solving skills and verbalize your thoughts and insights (for kids) about how you "tackle" interpersonal conflict.
- The direct teaching of social skills (nonviolent conflict management, assertive skills, empathy) has a significantly positive track record in violence prevention. Look for curriculum materials and methods that foster skill acquisition.
- John H. Hoover, St. Cloud State University
